Before you all start wittering and follow Big Bad Brad as Mighty Moaner please note that once again I have had to increase all handicaps - yes especially yours - to ensure that our slowest runner starts at 0.00. After adding one minute to the handicaps I then adjusted them based on performances at GP5.

Interesting to see that Viscountess Gilroy is the new race leader especially as Viscount Gilroy followed her in. One dare not assume that the Vicious Viscount prevented runners from overtaking the Viscountess to ensure that she obtained the Yellow Jersey. If enough people complain then we will have a stewards enquiry. Countess Clare is in second place but one has to notice that the Bad Blyth Baron is hovering menacingly in third position!

Another real concern is that Wily Walton and Gruesome Golightly are 5th and 7th respectively and they could well call in their Ferocious Fire Fighting colleagues to disrupt runners in future GP's.

On the team front one notices that GTS are the leaders - it is amazing that even though this is a friendly fun event there is a NSP "runner" (debatable) who on realising that GTS were doing well got this poor peasant against a wall (ok no accounting for taste!) and threatened all sorts of retribution unless I decreed that my forenamesake be credited as team captain. Pity that Plodder Phil can't run as well as his intimidating ways. Mind you for team consistency one cannot better the Chelsea Pensioners - exactly last but two three times in a row.

Interesting to see that on the night the three fastest were Roaring Rob, Raging Ryan and Ivan the Terrible with times of 18.41, 18.42 and 18.43, with Raging Ryan finishing 4th on the night and missing a T Shirt by only 3 seconds.

Congratulations to Giantess Gill who was 14th fastest overall in 22.07 and dared to be only 7 seconds slower than His Excellency. Mind you I have doubts about HE. Last GP he asked me for my shorts and yesterday when he ran by me he
stopped and said "Phil look at my shorts" The next fastest non humans were Countess Clare 24.57 and Her Highness Helen of Blyth 25.05.

What will Horrendous have to say this time when he sees his starting
colleagues???

Out of interest His Eminence produced the following fact sheet many years ago
Course Distance 3.57 miles
Pace per mile Time for course
5.00 17.51
5.15 18.45
5.30 19.38
5.45 20.32
6.00 21.26
6.30 23.12
7.00 25.00
7.30 26.45
8.00 28.34
8.30 30.21
9.00 32.08

By the way if you do not wish to have your handicap made more difficult then do not mention either MORPETH or my run in GP5 within earshot of me!!

The peasant